Saturday, June 30, 2007

The Flying Scotsman *

This film, about a bloke from my home town, is out this week. If you like inspirational sporting heroes, then I'm sure you'll like his story. I like this interview and particularly like the quote from Moser, whose world record Obree broke, towards the end of the piece, which also appears in Obree's book. In fact, this quote put a lump in my throat when I read it.

Btw, he didn't build his bike from parts of an old washing machine, he simply used one washer from a washing machine. Nevertheless, it's still quite a story.

* Spear of Destiny


O Canada *

Or should that be "Oh Canada!"? Apologies to all my Canadian readers (that will be, err, none), but, after reading this, I can only conclude that you are a nation of morons. Then again, this just about sums up my country of birth!!

* "O Canada" was proclaimed Canada's national anthem on July 1, 1980, 100 years after it was first sung on June 24, 1880. The music was composed by Calixa Lavallée, a well-known composer; French lyrics to accompany the music were written by Sir Adolphe-Basile Routhier. The song gained steadily in popularity. Many English versions have appeared over the years. The version on which the official English lyrics are based was written in 1908 by Mr. Justice Robert Stanley Weir. The official English version includes changes recommended in 1968 by a Special Joint Committee of the Senate and House of Commons. The French lyrics remain unaltered.


Edinburgh Man *

JJ and I had a wonderful few days in Edinburgh last week. Weird to say about the capital city of the country in which I grew up and lived for 23 years, but I don't know the place at all. My visits to the city were strictly for football matches (and my thanks go out to those Hearts fans who used to throw things at us as we approached Tynecastle, much appreciated), a rugby (league) match and, on very rare occasions, the odd demo or two. And, being from the west coast, my ignorant impression was that it was an unfriendly and stuffy. As I say, this was an ignorant impression. What JJ and I found was an amazingly beautiful city, extremely friendly and accessible pubs and bars and a city which is proud of its place in the world without being arrogant (unlike Glasgow, of course). JJ was worried about just how smitten I was with the place and I was tugged on the shoulder more than once when scanning the windows of estate agents and told to turn the page when looking at the jobs section of the local paper. Am I going a bit over the top? Maybe, but it's the first time for nearly 20 years that I've thought that, yes, I could live in Scotland again - but not for the moment!

We had a great time - or didn't you notice - and saw some lovely sights. A highlight for me was our walk up Calton Hill, with its gorgeous views over the city and beyond. And a highlight within this highlight was this structure (got to love it's nickname), which still has me laughing at the whole concept of its creation and in the fact that it remains unfinished. I wonder if anything ever happened to this idea or any others regarding attempts to have it completed?

I am missing Edinburgh and, most of all, I'm missing my time with JJ in Edinburgh. I have a funny feeling that we shall be returning there before too long.

*The Fall


Friday, June 29, 2007

Happy Anniversary *

This blog was three years old yesterday. Doesn't time fly when you're boring the pants off everyone?

Btw, internet access not good at the moment, but Orange tell me it'll be back to normal (i.e just irritating rather than fucking awful) by middle of next week. Just to say, Edinburgh visit was amazing - and Kev, why did you give us the wrong number ya chube ye?

*Some old bloke like Perry Como or someone like that

Thursday, June 21, 2007

Gary Gilmore's Eyes *

I'm sat here listening to Crossing the Red Sea With the Adverts and suddenly thought: "Wonder if there is any Adverts stuff on Youtube?" There is, it's great, I love it! So enjoy! Pity about the voiceover at the end, though.

*The Adverts

Who's He *

Right, okay, the bus driver described here might have been a tosser, but, fuck it, if this is her reaction, then she can fuck right off:

"Becoming even more apprehensive, she set off down a side alley and discovered she was in New Cross, one of the least salubrious regions of south London, perched between Peckham and Lewisham. It was midnight. She was a woman alone on the mean streets of SE14, abandoned to her fate by the driver..."

And she was going to fucking Catford??????????? As for her mate who thinks he's a journalist, he is getting hunted down and killed ... wait, that just might prove his point, so we'll just say he's a bourgeois prick and he sums up just why I can't stand reading the liberal press!

I don't read this crappy paper, so maybe someone can tell me that it's all post-modern irony or something.

* Trashcan Sinatras


Are You Ready To Be Heartbroken *

This is a big hairy pussy! And it has been inspired by Yorkshire Pudding.

*Lloyd Cole and the Commotions


R.E.S.P.E.C.T. *

You've got to admire a youngster who comes out with stuff like this.

*Aretha Franlin


Thursday, June 14, 2007

Male Model *

While looking up the internet for Brylcreem's web site today (it's a long story, don't ask), I came across the fact that the model used to promote this product during World War II was anarchist and pacifist (i.e. refused to fight fascism)Tony Gibson. Read all about it here.

Funny what you find out from the never-fails-to-amaze-me internet.


TV *

Has anyone been watching the truly terrible Seven Ages of Rock series? I've watched two of them so far and that, quite frankly, has been two too many.

Last week was punk, which, if you didn't know, consisted entirely of New York and London. Iggy Pop invented this phenomenon, if you were to take the film-makers' version of events, and was then followed by the Ramones (a mere 7 years or so after Iggy first released an album), Television and Patti Smith. Quite independently of this, the Damned, Sex Pistols and the Clash came along cos they didn't like people with long hair. Ooops, nearly forgot, the Slits were the only women who played this strange new music in London, so they also got a quick mention.

I watched the heavy metal edition last night - it was so brilliantly executed (wait, that should have been the researchers for this series who should be executed). Heavy metal was invented by Black Sabbath cos Tony Iommi had the tip of his finger cut off and so, the device he used to play his guitar first made that heavy metal sound. You think I'm joking? This is what the programme makers claimed. So there was Black Sabbath then Deep Purple and then ... Judas Priest!! Nothing before and nothing inbetween these three bands. Judas Priest were then the first people ever in the history of the world to wear leather clothes and metal studs and stuff. Then up pops Motley Crue and then there is nothing until Metallica are invented cos the singer hates Motley Crue (even though the singer says a Motley Crue album was so good that it forced his own band to change their style). Oh, and Metallic used to have long hair - wowfuckingwee!

This all made for worst music documentaries I have ever seen - including one I saw about the Manchester music scene once which didn't mention Joy Division or New Order or the Smiths.

Such was my criticism of this garbage, the boy, who I watched last night's with, told me to "shut up" on more than one occasion. I, on the other hand, thought that he would have made a better job out of making both programmes and by doing so with his hands tied behind his back.

Next week is stadium rock, which, apparently, ended cos no-one could top U2's stage shows from the early '90s. You think I'm joking? Then watch it! Alternatively, you could try washing your hair.

* Flying Lizards


Wednesday, June 13, 2007

You'll Never Make The Station

This could be interesting.

*Millwall fans

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Silly Kids Games*

Lions and tigers and Reidski, oh my!

Which movie was this quote from?

Get your own quotes:


Sunday, June 10, 2007

The Super Thing*

Following on from earlier posts of today, I wasn't exactly looking forward to weekend away. If truth were to be told, I was dreading it. I was family, but not really family anymore. I was a friend, but not really a friend on account of being family (but not really anymore). When I really think about it, to that lot (of really brilliant people, it has to be said) I am probably just "that bloke who turns up and is funny and who gets drunk." I'll accept that label - well, it is very accurate as I can (I know, terrible to admit these things oneself) be funny. But, unfortunately, I can also be a terrible drunk.

Anyway, I ramble. Why I called this post The Super Thing was cos all weekend I really really missed JJ and wished she was at my side at every second. And The Super Thing is that I get to see JJ tomorrow night. It will definitely be an oasis of perfection within a week of banality and drudgery. So I hope we can think up something lovely to do on a Monday night!

* Devo


White Wedding*

Was oop north (sorry for the stereotyping - err, on second thoughts, no I'm not) this weekend at a wedding involving family member of mother of the boy at which I attempted two rants.

One was about CPB-ML member, who is brother in law of the family, who once stated to me (and I don't paraphrase at all): "If black people don't get involved in the labour movement in Britain, then they should go back to where they come from." Fucking racist scumbag Maoist nutter!

Second rant was about the Muslim Brotherhood in Egypt and why the Stop the War Coalition would put out a press release - co-signed by brother-in-law of the person I was ranting at - defending them.

Needless to say, my attempted rants got short shrift at this wedding and I got pissed instead.

*Billy Idol


I Am A Cider Drinker*

Mate of mine ranted at me when this advert came on on the TV when we were in the pub the other day. He thinks it will encourage people to throw glass bottles into rivers/seas/lakes etc. I'm not sure, but I'm very sure how passionate he was and is about the issue.

Just thought I'd mention it.

*The Wurzels

Creep *

someone who reads this blog has sent me a message - you can find it here! Whoever you are, you are rather clever!


Friday, June 08, 2007


Seems like I picked (not that I had any say in it) the wrong weekend to go to a wedding up north. There is this, which I would have loved to have gone round with JJ. There is also this, which I would also have loved to have visited with JJ. And this, which I would have liked to have staggered out of with JJ. Not sure if she would have accompanied me on this, right enough!

*Kevin Tihista's Red Terror (thanks Martin - came today - you're a star)


Saturday, June 02, 2007

Foolish Pride *

I'm third top of Google searches on "hun scum" and this makes me happy!
*Daryl Hall


News Of The World *

Oh, yes, we believe him, don't we? Err, no!

There's something about the word "organ" in this story which has me smiling. Apart from that, the strange thing here isn't her day job, but that bizarre thing she gets up to on a Sunday morning!

Yeuch! The burger, I meant!

A look at this story tells us that the judiciary in India is as enlightened as our own. My favourite: “If by perseverance the snails could reach the ark, why can't these worthy ladies stand on and turn the scale?" - stupid cunt!

What about this poor geezer. He fall asleep in a country in which all are equal and all share the fruits of their labours (well, that's what the party told me) and wakes up in a country which wants the Telletubbies banned due to Tinky Winky's alleged sexual orientation.

Is there such a word as "unhandicapped"? This tosser seems to think so!

Click on this link. Then click to enlarge image. Then tell me: does his bum look too big in that?

*The Jam


Ramble On*

Bad news - I'm still alive!

What to blog about ... could write about me settling into my new gaff (in SE14 - yippee). Or could write about football and Celtic being the worst ever winners of the league title and then going on to beat Dunfermline in the cup final (thought the Pars deserved the extra-time, but tough shit). Or could write about football and how the FA Cup final was fucking awful. Or I could make a mention of how wonderful the play-off finals (and semis, come to think of it) were and how the play-offs put me in a quandary cos I always feel sorry for the teams who finish third and don't go up, but, on the other hand, the play offs are always so exciting. I could write about how last weekend's bank holiday was a wash-out but this did at least give JJ and I the opportunity to spend time indoors and in pubs. And, mentioning JJ, I could write about all the fantastic days and nights we've been spending together recently, lovely pubs, nice restaurants, meals indoors, lots of music we've been listening to. Or I could write about my parents' disastrous holiday as my dad had to be rushed into hospital and spent five days of his holidays in a hospital bed. Or about my sister getting married in a few weeks (a wedding I won't be able to go to cos they haven't given me adequate advance notice). Or I could mention how horrible is the sight of Blair off on a global goodbye tour, costing us taxpayers' millions of fucking pounds. Or about how stupid those Labour Party members are for criticising Gordon Brown (who I think is a right-wing prick, btw) for having the audacity of getting as many MPs' nominations as he could.

I'm sure there is lots of things to write about. The only thing is, I can't be bothered!

* Led Zeppelin